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[emblazes]

 
ᴄᴀʟʟ × ᴠᴏɪᴄᴇᴍᴀɪʟ × ᴛᴇxᴛ

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bi

[emblazes]

[He'll bend forward -- careful not to tip the foodbox over in the process; it's nudged partially onto Lance's leg just...to be safe. He's picking up those drinks, one of the two (they're the same soda) is offered to h is company.]

Here.

[He taps Lance's opposite thigh, forearm bumping his crotch in the process.]

You're gonna use my radio for sleeping?

[His radio only has a cassette player.....................there's certainly a radio option, as per the whole point of using it to talk to planets.]

[x-files theme song]

[competing]

[ it's by pure miracle alone that lance doesn't jump up shrieking when his crotch is suddenly accosted (haha he wishes). as it is, he just jerks in his seat a little (haha he wishes), which jostles the styrofoam enough that he's picking it up for safety.

and also to hold protectively in front of him, shrinking away from keith's proffered soda can. ]

I'm not thirsty!

[ he's so thirsty. ]

And yeah! I sleep better with music!

[ WHY DOES HE KEEP SHOUTING ]

[computer error noise]

[emblazes]

[Lance is 100% freaking out and the innocent, gentle alien boy cannot figure out why. It's no use asking either....since Lance doesn't even know he's acting weird. He's gonna get a look; it's enduring, he's quiet up until--]

Why are you yelling about it?!

[Forget the cassette thing. He's fully distracted from his radio being a piece of shit, and also from asking about the type of music he's into for sleepies...]

[competing]

[ classical.

but anyway, lance has reached his Limit. he hangs his head, shoving the styrofoam onto the nearby coffee table. ]

Nothing, I... I'm filthy. [ his mind is filthy. ] I'm gonna go take a shower, I think... [ he rises up onto his feet, already turning towards the hallway. ]

[emblazes]

[Why...this.

He looks from the food to Lance, back to the food....and he's rising up as well, setting both drinks aside.]

You don't-?!

[Look dirty, but Lance does have a strict routine of sorts. He's frowning anyway, suspicious -- but unable to accuse him of anything...aside from having a rough shift.]

Lance, wait...

[Here we go. He's awful at this.]

[competing]

[ he was thrown around a bunch... he was on the ground. but no, he's dusty at best, but he also thinks if he sits there any longer watching keith innocently munch on testicle-shaped dumplings he's gonna explode.

he's already got his back to keith, mid-way through the hallway when he looks over a shoulder, arching a brow. ]

What?

[ so caught up in his own concerns, he doesn't really realize his odd behavior could be having any negative effect on keith. so he naturally opts for a joke: ]

Wanna join me?

1/2

[emblazes]

[Blond_math_woman_meme.jpeg.

Pros: they've already done this before, it's not a big deal. He could probably use a bath? And more quality time with Lance is always ok.

Cons: ???? they can't eat in there.]

O...kay?

[Gotta work on the punchline, bro.]

[emblazes]

[So he'll wander up to him, set a hand on his back.]

You don't really look dirty.

[Just...for the record. It's a compliment!!]

[competing]

[ HE WASN'T ACTUALLY SUPPOSED TO AGREE TO IT. ]

Oh, um. Th...anks... [ he appreciates it. he is also slowly getting his head out of his own butt enough to realize keith is Making Some Efforts here. and here he is just ruining it by being a total horndog.

he smiles weakly, reaching up to grasp keith's other arm in a reassuring squeeze. ]

Sorry. I just need to [ uhhhhhhhh ] take care of something. First. I'll stop being weird after a couple of minutes, I promise.

1/??

[emblazes]

[Keith glances up at Lance; it's a long quiet, studying his eyes....]

[emblazes]

[Very..slowly...his face grows tense, like he's suddenly realized something.]

[emblazes]

[Something....... unpleasant.]

[emblazes]

[But natural!]

[emblazes]

Lance...

[A sigh.]

If you gotta...

[emblazes]

If you have to poop, you don't have to get all weird about it.

[competing]

[ ? ]

[competing]

[ ??!? ]

[competing]

[ ?!?! ]

[competing]

[ OKAY BUT WHY ]

[competing]

I'm not talking about poop!! I was just gonna jerk off, what the heck!

end ig...

[competing]

[ —oh shoot. ]

[emblazes]

[WELL...WHY WOULD HE ASSUME LANCE WAS GONNA J/O AHEAD OF ASSUMING HE WAS EMBARRASSED ABOUT DROPPING A DUKE? NOT THAT HE'S EVER BEEN ASHAMED OF IT BEFORE, OR FARTING IN FRONT OF PEOPLE FOR THAT MATTER...AH....]

[emblazes]

[BUT HE WASN'T EXPECTING THIS?]

fin

[emblazes]

..What?! Why-?

[He's Aghast. Like a Christian mother. In front of my Goddamn Chinese food?? REALLY?

wait

[emblazes]

[His eyes are drifting south...he can't help it. The angle doesn't provide a good...view...@ Lance's donger, but.]